Our Christmas Journal 2009

It all started a couple weeks ago. At this time, I was about to move to a city where I really didn't know anyone (well one but anyway), because I had no where else to go. We had until the 15th to leave. I was praying and waiting for God to move. We were going to a homeless shelter, because I felt that if I was going to be in a homeless shelter, I was going to move to the city I love.

Kayla handed me a note... Christmas gifts were the furthest from my mind. I mean we needed a place to live!

The note said "Momma don't worry about Christmas gifts, God will provide". I just smiled and said "Yes, baby, He always does".

The 15th rolled around and half way through the day, I got a phone call from the local housing authority saying that I have an apartment. I was excited. We are still waiting on getting moved there.

So many people has blessed us and here is a list from the many Santas that the Lord provided, thanks to the faith of my little girl. We have so much to be thankful for. Simply knowing the Lord is the best gift of all. He is an amazing God who loves us all so much.

Thanks to:

Oil City Substation (Caddo Parish police dept.) - $617 WalMart gift card - you don't know how much that means to us. God bless you all!

Trees Baptist Church - the beautiful Christmas carols and food. The ham was wonderful!

A beautiful couple - brought the kids many gifts and a $25 Brookshires gift card

A sweet friend and her family - you know who you are - thanks for blessing us all with gifts. I love the griddle and wanted one the other day, while visiting WalMart. You must have known ;)

Nannie Jo - blessing my kids with beautiful Christmas outfits. I will never forget you making our Christmas Eve dinner so special. Thanks - I love you!

Bro and Sis Holley - you are always a blessing to us. Thanks for the nice things and for being great pastors. No matter where I go, you will always be my pastor. I love you both so much!

All of my wonderful clients who blessed me with awesome Christmas tips.

Our school counselors who gave my kids' names to the Angel tree.

Walmart - hosting the Angel Tree - the customers who donated and God knows who you are! May He bless you abundantly.

Mom and Dad - you have always blessed us and I miss you both so much!

Mammaw Emmons - you have been such a great blessing since we have been homeless. You will never know how much I love you and appreciate you! Thanks for the nice gifts.

A church couple - Kayla loves her boots! The boys like thier toys as well.

Bro Jerry - Although you are my step cousin, I am very grateful that you have become a friend. Thanks for the things that belonged to your grandmother. They are all a blessing.

---

Christmas Eve we spent the evening with Nannie Jo and Bro Jerry at her house. Dinner was awesome. The kids opened their gifts and we had a great time.

The kids and I slept until noon Christmas day. We got up and I made omelets with left over ham and pancakes. We had no snow :( - I was upset. We went back to Nannie Jo's for hot cocoa. Then we went and did our gingerbread house.

Saturday we hung out all day after waking up at noon. We played with the toys and had a great time.

Sunday we had a great service. We had a wonderful Christmas and yes, despite the library was closed for four days lol. It will be again this weekend. What's in store for next year? I know it will all get better!

My Heart is Full

I don't even know where to start. My children and I are so blessed. I can now tell my oldest son that his Christmas wishes have come true. This will be the best Christmas ever. They will get everything that they want on their Santa letter I had them write. (well with the exception of LZ's PSP, DSi and Wii lol- we are settling for a used PS2 - he is still too little and considering he has costed me about $600 in cell phones, uh he is lucky to have a TV to play the games on!).

Anyway, my kids and are were blessed by the Caddo Parish Sheriffs Dept. this year, just to name one Santa. I am totally ecstatic over the thoughtfulness and am eager to share with you all about what they have done. That will come later.

All three of my kids were blessed by my Pastor's mother-in-law, who they call Nanny-Jo. She bought them each a beautiful Christmas outfit. Pics to come. Nanny-Jo also shared the true meaning of Santa with Kayla (to reiterate what I have told her). She explained that the Lord moves on people to do things for kids. These people are Santa(s). I just smiled and agreed.

The Wal-Mart Angel Tree has also blessed my kids this year, thanks to our school counselor. See why I love Wal-Mart so much :) The Lord has blessed us in many ways. Ecc. 11:1

There is so much more that I want to share about how we have been blessed this Christmas, but I will later, when I have pics. What a great feeling to know that we are loved by so many. May God bless them all!

My Son's Christmas Wish

The other night, my kids and I were talking right before bed. The kids started pretending that they were talking to Santa. I played Santa. It was so cute because even though they all know that Santa is really not "real", they are learning that uhm this year he is real.

They each took turns sitting on my lap and telling me what they wanted for Christmas. It was so cute... one of those "you have to be there" deals. It was LZ's turn and he got up on my lap and said "I want my family to have the best Christmas ever". For a seven year old child to say that now and days is a blessing. Of course he mentioned a Ninetendo DS, a PSP, a Wii amongst other gaming devices. LOL

I am so blessed to have such loving and giving children. Times have been tough, but these are the times where we can really see our lights shine the most. I have so much more to be thankful for this year. The Lord has truly blessed us and I will be sharing more after Christmas.

This Time Seven Years Ago

This is a part of my life that I would rather not talk about. I have talked about it often in times past, but for those who don't know me well, I wanted to share an experience that changed my life forever. Consider this another update for my testimony and what the Lord has blessed me with.

I had just had my second baby and we moved from Arizona back to Louisiana. I had my son in August of 2002 and we moved back when he was about a month and a half. It was mid September when we moved back after 15 months. I knew that I had to come back, because there was something here that I left behind. I had to find it again. It was salvation and the Lord. It was the feeling that I had when I would spent Sunday mornings at the Potter's House church, right after Kayla was born. I would stay for worship and leave, so I never learned about salvation. The Lord was dealing with me. However, I knew then that what I felt was real, just as I knew when I felt the uncontrollable desire to come back. Little did I know about the war that I would have to fight in the next few months.

We had stayed with my ex husband's best friend for about a month. Then later we moved into his sister's house, with her husband and 2 kids. Tracy and I were always close and I love her, still. I love Jesse and Victoria as well. Those are her two kids. I had always admired Robert (her now ex husband) because he was a provider for his family and a good dad. Although I knew my purpose for leaving Arizona was not only because of the family drama, it was to go back to church. I didn't go back right away. Satan would see to it that I went through pure hell on earth before I did. And that, my friend, I did.

I know now that I must have suffered from an anxiety attack, thanks to an angel who seems to know. I knew it wasn't good, but never could give it a name. Now I can see that I had all of the symptoms of an anxiety attack, including parts of my past haunting me, to include fear. I won't go into detail about all of that, but I will say that I had a severe anxiety attack that landed me in the psychiatric ward for 9 days.

It all began with what I now know to be post pardum depression, stress because of our living situation to top it off with insomnia, not eating for a week and the biggest was fear. This had gone on for about a week. I didn't eat or sleep for a week and I had a brand new baby and a 2 year old. I nursed my baby, but my milk supply was low because of the stress and no eating. All that did was make matters worse for both my baby and I. All of these led to a dominoes effect.

All the while these things were happening, I cried out to the Lord for mercy. I never really knew how to pray. The people around me were not too spiritual besides the Buddahs and dragons laying around. They said they were Christian, but I have always felt another spirit. Anyway, I just prayed and cried out to the Lord. This was on December 16, 2002.

I was scared of my husband and anyone else around me. He always made me fearful and the trust was long gone anyway. Many things happened and little did I know this was all happening because the Lord had greater plans. I am sure they are still in the making.

I began to speak in another language. At first I was scared of it but I did feel a sense of peace. Sometimes I wonder if it was the Holy Ghost or another language. The bible speaks of many. I ask this because the experience of speaking in tongues at church the following year (right after my youngest was born) felt so much different. There are tongues of angels as well. I want to learn more about that too.

I had met a lady while I was in the hospital those nine days. All I remember is that her last name was Smith (like mine at the time) and she was there because her husband wanted a divorce is she didn't get help. She confided in me about things and I gave her good advice. She took my advice and told me that she thinks I helped save her marriage. She even sketched me a picture of an angel for Christmas. (I still have this). She encouraged me in the midst of my own chaos. I hope that she is still married and that she is better. It is a blessing to be a blessing even when your own world is turning upside down.

I went without smoking those nine days and was repenting of it. However, I started back up when I got out. I sought the Lord and read in the Bible about baptism in Acts 2:38. The Lord showed me this scripture and told me to call the church to see if they baptised like Peter spoke of in Acts. I never heard of this as I was raised in the Catholic church. Sister Holley brought me a Bible study about it and I began going to church. I am still in this church, baptised and filled with the Holy Ghost.

Through all of that I was able to touch a life and hopefully make a difference. If I went through all of that just to encourage that lady and be there for her when she needed a friend, is was all worth while. The Lord works in mysterious ways. I am honored to be used for His glory. I had missed my baby's first Christmas that year. Many things has happened since then, but I am so blessed that the Lord has strengthened me and has always been there for me. I am truly blessed!

A Friendly Man at the Grocery Store

I went grocery shopping, yesterday. If you know me, you know I hate shopping and especially with the kiddos. I wasn't in a bad mood yesterday at all, I was just ready to get in and out of the store.

I ended up running into a couple people I knew, so I talked while I was there. I entered the kiddos to win The Biggest Stocking in the World. The boys were fascinated with what was in it. Being a faithful customer of about 13 years, I just smiled when the manager went over and goofed with the boys for a second. I explained to the boys that I had already entered them in but the manager said that I can sign up everytime I shop.

Finally I went and paid my monthly storage rental fee and headed out the door. By this time, I was definitely ready to go. Smiling and freezing, I made my way to the car.

A little about me: I am the type who thinks she can do it all by herself. I don't know how to react when someone offers to help me. When they do it's usually "Nah, I will get it". I am finally learning to allow others to help me.

This man was sitting in his truck and offered to put my buggy back. I was shocked at first. It's not everyday that someone would ask. Being the independant person I was, I made a huge deal about it.

"So you need the buggy?", I asked as if that is why he gestured to return it for me.
"No, I just thought I would put it back so you won't have to walk that far away".

At first, I was hesitant, but then I replied with a smile "Sure, thanks".

Sometimes we have to allow others to do for us. Allowing him to return the buggy for me not only made him feel good, it taught me that people want to help and love others the way I do, so I need to let them. This is a valuable lesson in life and the Lord has been teaching me this for awhile. In fact here is an article that I wrote about it last year. - I Admit it, I am Selfish

My Six Year Old Miracle

Today Jorli turns 6. Okay at about 4:03 A.M. he turned six. This is my memory of the birth of my youngest child.

I had just got off the phone with my real mother, wondering where she was. I was due and she was suppose to be there for the birth of my new baby. I didn't know what I was going to have, because just like his brother, he was a surprise.

My water had broke at home at about 10:30. This was the first time that my water broke at home. I was enduced the other times. I really knew it was time.

Grabbing my already prepared bag of clothes and stuff, we headed out the door. We took Kayla and LZ to my ex Sis-in-laws house. She wanted to go with us for his birth, so Uncle Robert babysat.

I remember being in labor for it seemed like, forever. The doctor finally decided to come over as I was delivering him. I remember the sharp pains stinging through my spine and the ball of my back. I had back labor with my boys. I didn't have any pain meds or an epiduaral either.

"You didn't give her an epidural?", I remember Dr. LaCoco ask.
"She didn't want any", the nurse replied.

At this time, he was just walking in and the EM paramedic was rubbing the crap out of where it hurt the most. I honestly believe I would've come off that bed if it weren't for her. Everyone else sat around, clueless (which made it worse). If you know what natural back labor is, you know what I mean.

"The baby is coming, doctor", exclaimed the nurse.
"Well have her hold on and stop pushing", he said as he took his sweet time washing up.

I was so frustrated because there was no stopping him. He was pushing himself out! The doctor finally made his way over there in time to catch him.

The 9 pound 6 ounce bundle of joy was welcomed with loving arms by his mommy.

Jorli's first word was Jesus. He is amazing and happy little guy. No matter what happens, he is always smiling and laughing. I am just amazed at the little gentleman that he is becoming. He is truly a blessing to me.

There Are More Than One Santa?

As I was sitting here at the library yesterday, going about my daily routine, I didn't expect someone to stand behind me and call my name. My heart leaped as I turned to face a Caddo deputy

"Are you Katy?", he asked.

I replied, anxiously "Yes, sir".

As you can imagine everything was going through my mind. Was my family ok? Who has died? Who is in jail? The thoughts were endless. Then he asked to speak to me in private. By this time, I would have almost broke into tears and I almost did.

He explained to me that the Caddo deputies get together every Christmas and buy things for needy children and that someone had given him my name. My eyes began to tear up but my excitment and thankfullness, put a smile on my face instead.

I could feel the love in this man's words and his facial expression. I knew I was looking into the face of Santa, this year. He is not the only Santa that my kids have. We are so blessed.

Christmas is a special time of the year. There are many kids that do not have a Santa in their life. My daughter looked at my yesterday and said "Mom is Santa real?". She said it in an almost-trying-to-convince-me tone. She knew this answer because I have always taught my kids that there is no such thing as Santa. I didn't want to lie to them, so they will later on find out and be hurt. I also want them to know that Jesus is real, even though we can't see Him. Santa is not.

This time I had to tell her the truth about Santa. I explained that Santa is really a spirit. The spirit of giving is what makes Santa real to many kids. He comes in many forms, from police officers to our church members and also another church (this year). Santas are those people that ring the bell at WalMart when it is freezing out. They are there to get money for Christmas presents for kids who don't have them.

Santa really works all year round, because the spirit of giving is Santa. When we give to others, we have the spirit of Santa and that spirit comes from God. Jesus wants us to be like that, so He uses many Santas to share the gift of giving, just like He did when He was born in a manger and died for our sins.

She was so happy to hear that and I am glad. Yes, Santa is very real, not just at Christmas time, but all year long.

My $10 Steal

Not too long ago, I went on my weekly laundry adventure in the next town north of us. It is about a 45 minute drive, but hey the clothes need to be washed, right? Anyway, I went ahead and stopped inside Wal-Mart to see what they had on sale.

Keep in mind that I never really buy clothes, unless they are on sale (really on sale). Can't afford them, but I still have to buy them, none-the-less.

Anyway, I knew that my boys needed some jeans and school pants. I went browsing in the boys section and I noticed that there was a $1 rack. Thinking that there were probably a bunch of shirts, I decided to take a look. To my surprise, there were about 9 pairs of pants (jeans and school) on sale. I bought all 9 pairs and spent about $10. You can't beat that. We were blessed

Santa Claus is Coming To Town!

Last year my church blessed us with new bikes and other little gifts. I am so grateful for that. This year I know that I won't be able to afford much, but I know that we are blessed and the Lord will make sure that my kids have a Christmas.

I actually was going to sign up for the a Christmas gift program, but it was too late and I didn't have all that I needed to have to become eligible. We needed proof of residence and other things that I would need to aquire before they deemed my kids eligible for toys. That was fine, because I know the Lord supplies.

I recently lost a client, who is also a member of our church. They cut her pay back and she couldn't afford the luxury of a maid. She came to me at church and told me that if it was okay, she wanted to help us out with Christmas. I didn't know what to say. I was speechless. All I could say is "I would love that". Amazing how the Lord provides.

Yesterday, when I talked to another client, she wanted the kids' sizes because they do a Christmas gift program at their church. Again, we are blessed. The Lord knows that I can't afford Christmas, but He will always send someone else to be Santa.

The pic is of my kids at our soon-to-be new church.

Looks like Santa Clause is coming to our church this year! Praise the Lord.

Teaching My Kids to Give

Amazing how kids catch on so easily. They are quick to help and bless others. My kids are the prime example. I have always taught my kids how to be giving. I feel that this is a good quality that should be instilled from a young age.

I have always taught my kids that the Lord blesses a happy giver. He will bless us if we give from our hearts and that is exactly what He did for us today, in more ways than one.

Last night I feel that the Lord inspired me to participate in "Give Christmas Away". This is a Christmas mission to Africa. We are to gather items in shoe boxes for children in Africa. This is to reach out to them with the love of Christ. Many of them have never heard of the name of Jesus and what an awesome way to show them, by taking them a Christmas gift. I made a call to see if a friend has any shoe boxes. She didn't, so I was kinda bummed, seeing that today is the last day.

Instead of that, I decided to go ahead and pick up some canned goods on my way home from doing laundry, last night. We got back to the church and we all sorted them out. I explained to the kids that although we are poor, there are others out there that have it worse than us. They really didn't need that explanation, because they just love to give, but I wanted them to know that there really are a lot of people worse off than us.

We sorted them all out and I even took the tuna out of the cabinet. I did this purposely to show my daughter something. As I knew she would, she said "Momma, tuna is my favorite. Why are we giving that away"?

I just smiled and said, "Sometimes we have to make sacrifices and even if it is giving the best of what we have". She agreed and I told her that the Lord will bless her for giving her favorite canned food away.

This morning I was on my way to my cleaning job. While I was there, I received a phone call from the lady that I clean for. She also happens to be the counselor at the school. She asked me if I needed any canned foods. I just giggled and explained that my kids brought some up there today. I ended up telling her my entire situation and also how I was teaching my kids to always give, no matter what.

To make a long story short, she brought me this huge box of food with all sorts of things that the kids love. Things like Ravioli and Jello. I almost cried but my smile wouldn't allow me to.

I can now show my kids that the Lord will bless their giving. Especially when they give the best that they have.